the results...dun dun DUUUUUUUN

breaking news!!!

having successfully donned anything and everyting that could be construed as 'chavvy', i decided to take a look in the mirror. what a sight.

i looked the best i've ever seen myself! it was so wonderful that i still am wearing the majority of it! i now understand why chav fasion is so widespread, it can make the most homeley looking onion into scarlet johanson. so in conn to my experiment, we should all become chavs and feel good about ourselves!!!

of course that last paragraph was a concoction of lies and ill-directed malice. upon looking at myself in the mirror i felt physically sick. i strongly advise you do not repeat my experiment as i ended up looking like this:

just imagine your face on top of his. not pretty is it.

just dressing up like that gave me that surley grapefruit attitude i was going for (which truth be told has still not faded). in fact, my self-sacrifice (of which shall NEVER be repeated) has unveiled unto me a most terrible truth... the reason chavs are so anti-social and bad-tempered is because they look like twits 99% of the time.

solution? i'm glad you didn't ask. because i'm all for freedom of expression, i refuse to say 'nyanyanya, you can't do this blahblahblah you can't wear that...' because that just makes my blood boil. so therefore, i have turned once again to passive agression. if faced with a spotty chavlette or tramping chavette or even, god forbid, a blinging alpha chav, i shall walk past them. ignore them. then replace their bling withmirrors that laugh whenever they look in them.

i'm not mean honest...

i'm going to extend my thanks to thatgirl who gave me a great idea of how to progress my story. i shall give you a cyber cookie in thanks.

thats all for today.

feel free to keep sending in suggestions for the progression of my story....help please!

au revoir mes amis!